THE STORY
While spending time in Chicago over the Christmas holiday a close gay friend of mine told me about his new job. He said, "One of the other guys in my office is extremely gay," followed with an impression of a stereotypical gay man's "womanly voice."
A chorus of laughs erupted from the other people listening to the story. Another friend said, "Oh, you mean he's a momma's boy," followed by another round of laughs.
Later in the trip I involved myself in a debate on gay marriage. My friend lived in London and he mentioned that British gays laugh at American gays because they believe we need to get over the word "marriage" and deal with "civil union."
I told him that I firmly believe in the stance given Portia De Rossi on The View. Here’s the interaction between De Rossi and Elizabeth Hasselbeck: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lNeE4QEVSw
"Take men and women. Women want all the rights of men, but they're not asking to be called men," Hasselbeck said. "Do you think...is the word [marriage] more important than the rights?"
"No, of course the word isn't more important than the rights," De Rossi responded. "Without the word, we don't have equal rights."
DeRossi then hit it right on the money with the following comment:
"Every citizen of this country should have that legal right to be married. Marriage, the word, actually does mean something because people who see a gay coupling as a lesser thing in society can continue to [think] it's lesser than marriage when really it's the exact same thing. [It’s] the exact same love, the exact same commitment, love of family."
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DECIPHERING IT ALL
I woke up in the early hours of Christmas morning – laying on an air mattress in the bedroom I grew up in - reflecting on the aforementioned conversations.
I clearly remember the jabs my high school buddies and I would trade with each other - redneck, Guido, Pollock, gay, etc. I participated and/or laughed at many of our attempts at hilarity which I now equate to childish and immature trash talk that really wasn’t meant to be harmful.
But when I hear these remarks now, as I stand older, wiser and in a country that still hasn't afforded me equal rights, I find this behavior to be disheartening. Moreover, blatant discrimination within a minority group - my minority group - lights a blazing fire within me I've found hard to extinguish.
DEATH PENALTY FOR GAYS IN UGANDA
As I complain about the unfair equality issues in U.S., reports are released about proposed legislation that would impose the death penalty for gay Ugandans, and their family and friends could face up to seven years in jail.
This proposed "gay genocide" challenges gay Ugandans - stop being who you are as a human being or be put to death. Family and friends will need to choose between love for another human and their quality of life.
CONCLUSION
It's hard to fathom oppression of this magnitude with what I'm afforded as a gay American. With strong people like De Rossi and Ellen DeGeneres, I believe our country is making steps towards equality.
The proposed gay genocide in Uganda shows how far the LGBT people around the world need to go for not only LGBT equal rights - but human rights!
We need to band together and fight for equality - at home and abroad - and not participate in senseless remarks that bring our people down – there’s enough of that horrible behavior out there already!
